Category: 7) Bones

The Love Mask: How we use Submission to Get Love

When a person is inclined to choose love as their pseudo-solution, they have the basic feeling that ‘if only I were loved, then everything would be OK.’ So love is supposed to solve every problem. In reality, life doesn’t work this way, especially since love is something we’re to give, not get locked into demanding we receive. Flying under the…


The Power Mask: How we use Aggression to Stay Safe

Some of us seek power as our pseudo-solution for getting our needs met in life. Here we think that the answer to all our problems lies in having power and being independent. This may be our pervasive life solution, or this may only show up in certain areas of our lives. As with all pseudo-solutions, there will always be a…


The Serenity Mask: How we use Withdrawal to Avoid Pain

The pseudo-solution of withdrawal is often chosen when we have been so torn apart by the first two options—submission and aggression—that we had to find a way out. So we resorted to withdrawing from our original inner problems, and then also, as such, from life. Underneath our withdrawal is a false attempt at serenity. So now we’re still torn in…