P1 Each recognition, each insight, each honest admission, each shedding of a partial mask, each breaking through of a defense, each step of courage and honesty where you take responsibility for your negativity, is a lighting of yet another candle.
P2 Now let us specifically talk about the need for self-acceptance. Again and again you lose sight of its importance and you get stuck in your self-hate, which then makes you put the blame on someone or something else. I want to convey to you that there is nothing whatever that need be rejected, nothing whatever you cannot accept and forgive. The only thing that is truly destructive and makes you lose your bearing is not accepting and forgiving and therefore acting out.
In every negative quality a positive one is embedded. The negative traits are nothing but distortions of positive divine expressions. In your hatred you are in darkness. In your denial of the hatred you are in a much bleaker darkness, much further away from the light. You then become hopeless because you no longer know where you are. But step by step you find your way back.
You admit your hatred, and it is no longer quite so dark. You light a candle with this truthful admission. And as you accept the infantile egocentricity within you, you light another candle. For by accepting it, you will come to know that the infant can grow. Only in the acceptance of the infantile egocentricity can you find the birth of the Christ within, of the eternal consciousness that contains all there is. No matter how negative, destructive, evil, dark, bad something may be, it is but a distortion of something beautiful.
QUESTION: I judge others all the time. What is the positive original component in that? ANSWER: Apart from the obvious projection of your very harsh judgment against yourself that you do not wish to acknowledge to the extent it exists, the original positive quality in being judgmental is a great capacity to distinguish, to differentiate. It is the power to recognize, to be onepointedly aware. If you use this ability creatively and constructively, it is obviously a wonderful asset without which a person would be incomplete.
So, you see, nothing as such must be “thrown out,” destroyed, negated. It must be transmuted. Transform negative judgement into recognition. Defiance, spite, stubbornness, rigidity are all derivatives of the same blockage. Their positive, original seed is the quality of being centered within, being firm, self-assertive, standing your own ground, being secure in your own self, rather than being constantly swayed and influenced by others and thus losing autonomy.
QUESTION I have a very strong lack of faith and do not want to believe in God. ANSWER: This is a distortion of the healthy, realistic attitude regarding self-responsibility and self-dependence, of knowing that there is no authority that will do it for you.
QUESTION: What is the positive aspect of a fearful, anxious state? ANSWER: Fear, in general, is a distortion of caution, an awareness of something, somewhere, being amiss. Specifically, in the human state, anxiety is always a sign of repression. Such a state is a gauge for you that tells you that there is something you do not wish to see and that makes you anxious.
So anxiety is really not even a distortion of something positive; it is positive, in the sense that it is a signpost pointing to where you wish to remain ignorant about yourself. Whenever you are in anxiety, know this clearly, for it is the truth. Set out with full commitment to the truth to find out what your denial is specifically. Go into deep meditation. Denial of the truth of the matter is what creates anxiety.
QUESTION: I have a stake in being rebellious, in going against authority and even against what I know to be the truth. What could possibly be positive in the origin of this destructiveness? ANSWER: The original aspect, before distortion sets in, is a spirit of courage and independence, a fighting spirit against submission to conformity. Only in its distorted version does it become a blindly driven, senseless destructiveness.
QUESTION: What is the positive origin in my tendency to avoid taking responsibility for my life, my tendency to avoid? ANSWER: In its original, divine manifestation it is the quality of letting go and letting flow, of not letting the ego-control take over and blot out the eternal flow of being, of not being cramped and tight and overactive with the ego forces. I give you this knowledge to perceive that there is nothing bad in itself except what defense and error create temporarily.
QUESTION: What is the positive origin of playing the victim game? ANSWER: The distortion is self-exoneration at the expense of making others guilty, whose victim you profess to be. The truth is the longing for the perfect state you contain in your nucleus, which is not a fixed perfectionism, but the ever moving, changing perfection of the innermost soul.
QUESTION: What is behind the defense and compulsion of telling jokes? ANSWER: Life in the universe is joyous, pleasurable, it is light-hearted, it is humor. Humor is a significant divine aspect. There cannot be beauty and love without humor.
QUESTION: Competitiveness? Self-centeredness, wanting to be the center of attention? ANSWER: Self-centeredness is a direct distortion of seeking your inner center. If you are centered within your divine self, then vanity and egotism stop. Vanity and egotism exist if the search for the divine nucleus is applied to the separated ego. Ambitiousness and competitiveness are a distortion of the inner movement to create the best that you can be.
But, again, when put into the service of the separated ego, it becomes an endeavor that sets oneself into opposition to another self. In reality, on the divine level of inner truth this does not exist. All can be their best without interfering with one another. In its original it is, “How can I be my potential best?” In its distortion it manifests as, “How can I be better than others?”
QUESTION: Abuse of power, of a position of authority? ANSWER: Distortion of true leadership. True leadership is taking responsibility, paying the price for leadership. Distortion of it wants the glory of it, the advantages, in a selfish, vain way.
QUESTION: I can’t imagine anything positive in the tendency to remove yourself, being “cool,” pretending to be different? ANSWER: The divine original aspect is self-containment, self-sufficiency, impartiality, serenity. In every healthy life there must exist a harmonious balance between sharing intimately with others in a dynamic exchange, and being in solitude so as to refuel from within. They must coexist in utter emotional comfort.
P6 Address to the children. The more you can consider the possibility that things you cannot see and touch are often much more real than those you can see and touch, you will gain a new understanding of life. Another thing I would like to tell you to help you is that no injustice exists, even if it seems that way. Do not waste your time in complaining about injustice.
If someone else seems to get more than you, wait before making the final judgment that this is so. Allow yourself to consider that there may be things you cannot see, that you may have other things that those whom you envy do not have, and that there is a long chain of circumstances that is as yet invisible to you that makes what appears an injustice quite just.
P8 Maybe you can always remember that your fears are misunderstandings, false beliefs. So much of the anger you have, and therefore also of the fear, is because you do not always get what you want right away. Not having what you want is not a terrible thing. You can perhaps allow in your mind that it is okay not to get what you want.
Difference between childish and childlike: It is perhaps the quality I just described, the inability to accept frustration, which is childish or immature. So is the inability to take discipline.
—The Pathwork® Guide