She will find herself if she is willing to lose herself. He can lose himself when he is willing to find himself. Same result, different routes.
The Pull
12 Self-fulfillment through self-realization as a man or a woman
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She will find herself if she is willing to lose herself. He can lose himself when he is willing to find himself. Same result, different routes.
She will find herself if she is willing to lose herself. He can lose himself when he is willing to find himself. Same result, different routes.

If we hope to fulfill our lives, we must fulfill ourselves. Full stop. We accomplish self-fulfillment or self-realization as a man or woman on many different levels and in many different areas of our lives. Job-one is going to be finding a primary vocation—one in which we can develop, growing in it and through it. We will want to cultivate this in every possible respect.

We’ve also all been fundamentally endowed with a handful of general human potentials. We need to bring these up to snuff. On top of this, we need to find and develop our individual assets. We do so by building up and integrating the already-obstruction-free parts of ourselves into the rest of our personalities; and we have to clean up the bits that aren’t as-yet so shiny. Then we do the hokey-pokey and turn ourselves around. Because that’s basically what it’s all about.

But wait, there’s more. The idea of self-fulfillment means something even more specific. It’s about that age-old boy-girl thing. Let’s face it, humanity is made up of men and women. And none of us can reach self-fulfillment if we don’t fulfill our manhood or our womanhood. Everything else hinges on this primary endeavor. So let’s explore what this means in more detail.

First, a few words about these teachings. When we embark on a path of self-discovery, new layers of our psyche come into awareness. We get access to new fertile ground to explore. These lectures are aimed directly at these layers as they come up. Without following an intensive path of self-development, we’re not going to readily reach these layers.

As we read these words, we may feel an inner echo as we gain an understanding that goes beyond intellectual and theoretical grasping of the material. It’s also possible these words will only resonate later on, when the layers we’re trying to reach become more accessible. The important thing to realize is that we’ll make use of this material in an entirely different way if we are consciously working to free these deeper layers—doing the deep inner work—than if we just read or listen to these words. The difference is real.

Without having an inner experience of truth, we will find these teachings to be merely self-evident, or maybe even far-fetched. But when we allow ourselves to be affected deep inside our beings, they will help us to transcend ourselves, to understand our problems in a more profound way.

However we go about it, no path of self-realization can work without bringing forward our attitudes towards ourselves as a man or woman. This necessarily will bring us to look at our attitude and approach to the opposite sex as well. Sometimes we will take the path that promises to skirt this issue entirely. We may find this whole topic unpleasant to look at. But as always, the greater our resistance, the more compelling is the case that there is something to see.

Listen and learn more.

The Pull: Relationships & Their Spiritual Significance

The Pull, Chapter 12: Self-Fulfillment Through Self-Realization as a Man or a Woman

Read Original Pathwork® Lecture: #122 Self-Fulfillment Through Self-Realization as Man or Woman