10 Unpacking the pain of our old destructive patterns
Bones
10 Unpacking the pain of our old destructive patterns
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Not only have we done nothing to mitigate the original pain, we’ve invited more of it. Nice work, everyone.
Let’s talk about pain. And more importantly, let’s discuss how to dissolve pain… The climate we grew up in affected us—it was like perpetually receiving a minor shock… We suffered and believed our suffering was unchangeable. And this conditioned us to create defenses—highly destructive defenses…
We repressed the original frustration and pain we couldn’t deal with, and we put it out of our awareness. There, it smolders in the unconscious mind… Our defense mechanisms of aggression, submission and/or withdrawal fully developed… Our images are also a form of defense, designed to fight against painful experiences by erecting a rigid wall constructed entirely from wrong conclusions…
In every case, we hurt others while also inflaming our own wounds. Because thanks to the law of cause and effect, hurting others has ramifications for us. There will be consequences. So, not only have we done nothing to calm the original pain, we’ve invited more of it… Rather than abandoning our limping pseudo-solutions, we wrap them into our idealized self-image. Here, the agenda is to make us feel better than everyone else…
Since the nature of the idealized self is falseness and pretense—we act perfect since we can’t be perfect—we feel alienated from ourselves, from others and from life… We’ll come to realize that pain feels far better than being alienated from ourselves and feeling numb…
Jill Loree grew up in northern Wisconsin with parents who embraced their Norwegian, Swedish and German heritage. Foods like lutefisk, lefse and krumkaka were prepared every Christmas. And of course there was plenty of beer, bratwurst and cheese all year round.
She would go on to throw pizzas and bartend while attending college at the University of Wisconsin, and then moved into a career in technical sales and marketing. She would settle in Atlanta in 1989 and discover that the sweet spot of her career would be in marketing communications. A true Gemini, she has a degree in chemistry and a flair for writing.
One of Jill’s greatest passions in life has been her spiritual path. Raised in the Lutheran faith, she became a more deeply spiritual person in the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) starting in 1989. In 1997, she was introduced to the wisdom of the Pathwork Guide, which she describes as “having walked through the doorway of a fourth step and found the whole library.”
In 2007, she completed four years of training to become a Pathwork Helper, and stepped fully into her Helpership in 2011. In addition to offering individual and group sessions, she has been a teacher in the Transformation Program offered by Mid-Atlantic Pathwork. She also led marketing activities for Sevenoaks Retreat Center in Madison, Virginia and served on their Board of Trustees.
In 2012, Jill completed four years of kabbalah training and became certified for hands-on healing using the energies embodied in the tree of life. She began dedicating her life to writing and teaching about personal self-development in 2014.
Today, Jill is the proud mom of two adult children, Charlie and Jackson, and is delighted to be married to Scott Wisler. She’s had more than one last name along the way and now happily uses her middle name as her last. It’s pronounced loh-REE. In 2022, Scott joined her full time in their mission to spread the teachings of the Pathwork Guide far and wide.
