We can check to see whether we are thinking, speaking or acting from our light or our darkness: Am I serving connection or separation?
This chapter offers a clean, almost no-nonsense lens for navigating life: are you choosing connection or separation?
At our core, it says, we’re made up of qualities like truth, love, and wisdom—and when we’re aligned with that inner “light,” connection naturally follows. But on the surface, we carry distortions—old wounds, faulty beliefs, defensive habits—that pull us toward judgment and distance.
The tricky part is how subtle this can be, especially when we’re convinced we’re right.
The author brings it back to something practical: in any moment, we can pause and ask what we’re really serving. Are we building a case, or trying to understand? Are we closing off, or staying open?
It’s not about being perfect—it’s about noticing, and choosing again. The idea lingers in a useful way: even small shifts toward connection can ripple outward, and inward too.
Jill Loree is the founder of Phoenesse and a longtime student of the Pathwork teachings. She has studied the Pathwork Guide’s material since 1997 and completed four years of training to become a certified Pathwork Helper.
When she first encountered the Pathwork teachings, she described the experience as “walking through the doorway of an AA fourth step and finding the whole library.”
Through Phoenesse, Jill writes and teaches about personal transformation using the spiritual psychology found in the Pathwork lectures.
Her books present these teachings in clear, accessible language to help readers apply them in everyday life. Her work focuses on helping people move from the struggles of duality toward the peace of inner unity.
Raised in northern Wisconsin, Jill began her professional career in technical sales and marketing before discovering that her true calling lay in spiritual teaching and writing.
She lives in New York with her husband, Scott Wisler, who now works with her in sharing these teachings around the world.
